My head hurts. My ego too, a little bit. I was so sure, you know? It was next year! We made it! I had a lot to say to anyone that would listen, or follow. Frankly I had a lot to say to everyone who wasn’t listening, too. It was “go Bills!” at every stranger at Tops, it was saying “let’s go buff-a-lo” with my car horn whenever I saw someone walking their dog in their Zubaz. It’s all we know. Unfortunately, this heavy feeling in the air on this otherwise sunny Monday morning is also something we know all too well. But, just like everything else that’s happened in the past 3-6-5 or so, this Monday morning feels…different.
Like most of my peers I’m sure, I turned to the ethers this morning to try and find some solace. As they say, misery does love company. Which, albeit rude, is ultimately true. Fortunately for my downward spiral however, what I found was almost aggressively the opposite. Turns out, pride and gratitude love company, too. I don’t know what I was expecting, because there is not a stitch of inconsistency in the fabric of this fandom. We simply do not operate like that.
Of course, there was plenty of disappointment peppered throughout my morning scroll, how could there not be? We were so close that we could taste it; and it tasted delicious. Hell, I about had an Uber waiting to bring me to Josh Allentown just to pay witness to whatever fandemonium would undoubtedly occur.
There was some warranted criticism regarding the execution of some plays, and the decisions against other ones, and I saw some disagreements about whether or not Josh should have tossed the ball at Okafor’s noggin (I thought it was funny). Spread throughout the low fog of a loss however, there was an undeniable glow of gratitude. A fiery and unwavering passion that burnt off any remaining doubt; we are the best fans in the world.
With no exaggeration, if for some reason you missed the game on Sunday night and you measured the outcome by the love of the Bills Mafia alone, you may have gotten the impression that we did in fact win the whole damn thing. And honestly, if it weren’t for that tear-jerking footage of Diggs watching the Chiefs’ winning ceremony, I don’t think you could convince me otherwise either, and I saw it happen. There’s a lot to be said about the resilience and loyalty of this town, and there’s even more to be said about how we act in the face of adversity. We stand up. No, we mount up. And we answer the call time and time again.
This season alone, we answered the call with about $2 million in donations to various charities, with more than a million of that going to Oishei Children’s Hospital in Patricia Allen’s name. We answered previous records with bigger, better, and bolder records. We swept our division, we swept the Pats, and honestly, I’m not sure which one was sweeter. We get to wear shirts with “AFC East Champions” splashed across them alongside our family crest, the Bills logo. Sure, would we collectively look hotter in Super Bowl LV tops and hats, of course. But at the risk of sounding incredibly lame and cliché, I think hope looks cute on everyone, and that’s what I saw the most of this morning.
“I wanna hug them all, and tell them what joy they really brought everyone, especially in these circumstances”, my friend and fellow Mafia member, Amy said, “because I love the Bills like I always have, and that’s with my whole heart”.
It was difficult to find a different sentiment across most platforms and within most conversations I had, and impossible to disagree. My brother reminded me of that Peterman game, you know, with all the interceptions. He said “if someone came up during that game and said; it’s all good, that rookie you have will be an MVP candidate & will have you in the AFC Championship game within 5 years – no one would have believed. That’s why this city isn’t rattled, because we believe.”
And it is beyond true, we aren’t rattled. We came humble and hungry and we’re moving forward humble and ravenous, unleashed and unstoppable. And we do believe, now more than ever, that we finally have the team we’ve spent so many “next years” waiting for.
One of the most common themes I saw this morning, like I mentioned, was gratitude. Immense and genuine gratitude. Not only for how close Josh, Stefon, Sean, and everyone involved brought us to the big game, but for what they showed us in the process, and for showing us a process worth trusting.
Fans were thanking them for the memories we all somehow still made together, even while being 6 feet, 6 miles, or 6 states apart. We were thanking them for the celebrations, for the togetherness, even for the memes. The Bills Mafia woke up this morning (and stayed up all night) with one last goal; make sure our team knows that we’re still here, and that some of us aren’t too concerned with being humble. We know what we’ve got now, and a hopefulness this tangible is dangerous in a fandom this hungry.
The phrase “one, in my lifetime” is familiar around here. It’s a slogan almost, as applicable as ever as the new generation of fans take the reins and keep circling these wagons. The closer we get, the stronger the pull. The deeper the ache.
“It’s going to fuel us”, our best friend, Josh Allen, said of the loss, “I have no doubt in my mind that we will be back.”
I can’t help but say, “yeah, obviously”.
We will see our guys on primetime in January again, and the Mafia will be right behind them the entire way. Sure, maybe we hopped back in line for next year, but not without carving our names into the barricade at the front. Not without a whole new furor, and an unstoppable momentum. We’ve got the team, and we’ve got the time.
Like Josh said, we’re still young.
-Meg Aures
Comentarios